Thursday, April 8, 2010

In case of an emergency- don't call me.

In college my friend and I decided to branch out from our normal collegiate productions and audition for an actual community theatre play. Yes, that's right. Carson-Newman couldn't hold us back. After dozens and dozens of call back rounds, we were cast as the Cupp sisters in the highly acclaimed production of "Pumpboys and Dinettes" produced by the esteemed Morriston Theatre Guild. Okay, only 5 people tried out and we were all cast. But it was still good, I tell ya. Cupp sisters 4-evah!

If you missed it, well then I just feel sorry for you. It was high art at its finest.

I digress. One night during rehearsal, the cast was sitting above a store front pondering the differences between Stanislavski and Meisner. All of a sudden, I caught a whiff of a nice pine smell. It was nostalgic and warm. It prompted me to say, "It smells like Christmas in here."

Five minutes later we realized that the entire building was on fire. My stupidity was later recorded for all eternity in The Morristown Gazette as, "One local actor was quoted as saying 'It smells like Christmas in here,'" as the entire building burned down. Not my finest moment.

Two nights ago I woke up to Rob saying the words nobody ever wants to hear. He turned to me at 2:15am and said, "Lauren, get up. The house is filled with smoke."

I had flashbacks. Did it smell like Christmas? I decided that it didn't. I ran and checked on the children. Their rooms were smoky, but no open flames. I searched, but couldn't find anything. So, I did what any normal person would do. I decided to think about what three things I would rescue.

You've all done it. You've all asked the question of what you would save if your house was on fire. So as Rob frantically ran around the house trying to find the source of the smoke, I was thinking- Hmmmm..... scrapbooks? Which dog? Bennett's new comforter? Maybe our Tivo. I've got some great episodes of LOST saved on there......

We couldn't find the smoke making culprit (maybe because John Locke can't escape the island) so we called the fire department. Then as Rob was helpfully showing them around the house, I was updating my status update on facebook telling the world that there were firemen in my house.

It turned out fine. Smoldering HVAC motor in our basement. The result was a smokey house, a terrible smell, a sleepless night, and a bill to a repair man that I don't want to talk about.

But I was thinking today- What would you do in a crisis? I have realized that I think fire smells nice, I think about what to rescue, and I update facebook. I am acknowledging that I may not be the best person to have around in an emergency. I pray that nobody around here has anything serious happen. God forbid that Bennett breaks a leg and I decide to update Twitter first.


starnes family said...

Lauren, I dare say you're venturing over into smart ellick land. Which makes me love you more.

I am proud of you for updating Facebook during the crisis. I get all of my news from Facebook, so I wouldn't have known about this unless you stopped to do so.

I also enjoyed the fact that you would have to choose a dog.

Please add children to your list next time. Maybe even put them at the top? Just a suggestion.

"Smells like Christmas in here." Printed in the paper.


Amanda Sutton Davis said...

As long as the FB post was both witty and informative, I think it's allowed during an emergency. As long as you remember to save the lives of your children. And at least one dog.

Brittny said...

I'm not sure which is sadder:
1) your children didn't seem to make your list (praying they made Rob's),
2) me putting underwear in my kids' Easter baskets, or
3) that I still don't understand what (or how and why) Twitter is?
But I'm with you, I love me the smell of a good fire!

Oh and I forgot to mention that when you asked what we think you did when you found no fire? My thought was went back to bed. I would have!

Caroline Armstrong said...

I meeean, I LOVE the fact that you stopped looking for the source of the fire and updated facebook...well, I don't love it love it, but I loved reading about it since no one was hurt.

I honestly was laughing out loud at the end of this post!

Carmen & Eddie said...

My Dear Friend!!!
Your talent with "the pen" astounds me:) Only you can make a crazy and scary event comical!!
And I agree with the other's, I assume that you were not thinking about your little angels cause you knew they were safe and that they would make the top of the list, but you may want to write that in any future blogs;)
I would be right there with you- Scrapbooks!!! For the dog issue, open the door and call them after you;) forget the Tivo, you can find all the episodes on line!

Lauren W said...

You guys are funny. OF COURSE I checked on the children first. You have clearly not played the game- What three things would you rescue?

Family members aren't allowed b/c of course you would rescue them first. Sigh..... come on, peeps. My kids would be the first two things in my arms.

Now Rob on the other hand..... I need to think about that one.