Tuesday, February 19, 2008

The Ramblings of a Third Trimester Insomniac

You know how everyone tells you to sleep as much as you can before the baby is born? I wish I could count how many times I have heard that I need to take naps now, rest now, sleep while I can.... Well, I'm trying, but it sure isn't working. My nights usually go something like this-

11:00 Bedtime
11:20 Bathroom trip
11:45 Bathroom Trip
12:15 Bathroom trip
1:00 Rob comes to bed
1:05 Oh no.... Rob woke me up and even though I don't have to go to the bathroom, I MUST GO!!
1:15 I'm still awake and everyone tells me I need to be sleeping. Is Rob wearing a breathe right strip?
1:20 Even though I don't have to go, maybe going to the bathroom will help me go back to sleep
1:30 Is everything ready for Bennett? I am so nervous. Why in the world did I get pregnant? I really want to reconsider this.
1:45 Hmmm... sleeping on my side hurts. And I have acid reflux. I think I'll go gag now.
1:55 That didn't help, but I appreciate Rob getting up and giving me water. I'll get up and play Spider Solitaire until I have blurred my vision so badly that I am kocked out.
3:15 I'm still playing spider solitaire and it's not working. I wonder what the Tivo recorded today?
4:00 Crap! I'm still up and I know I need to sleep. That was a very funny Colbert Report though. Where are the drugs that are safe for the baby?
4:15 Drugs taken. What if Bennett comes tomorrow? I'm not ready. I'll never be ready. What am I doing?
4:30 Great episode of Jon and Kate Plus 8. I'm glad I am only having one.
4:45 One last bathroom trip and I can sleep. Ah, yes... I am sleepy....good night.
5:00 Bathroom Trip
5:45 Bathroom trip. Look at clock. Wow! I got 45 minutes of sleep. Cool.
6:15 It still hurts to sleep on my side, but that's where I keep ending up. Oh, no! The alarm is going off in 30 minutes. How can I work like this? Must sleep... shouldn't those drugs work better than this? I am seriously considering writing a letter to.... someone.
6:30 Still awake. Why am I having a baby in a week? I can't remember to feed my dogs! What if I forget to feed her? What am I doing?
6:40 Bathroom trip.
6:45 Alarm goes off. Must get up for work. I hope my boss understands when I pass out at my desk.

The sad part about this blog is that I am not exaggerating too much. I am posting this blog at 2:15 (even though the time stamp says midnight. It's not. Trust me.) So anyway, I will get back to Spider Solitaire now. I wonder if Colbert will be funny tonight?


The Khans said...

Fun times Lauren. I just didn't drink anything after dinner towards the end no matter how thirsty I was so that I maybe wouldn't wake up. Good luck sleeping sometime in the next week. Looking forward to seeing your little girl when she arrives.

Stacy said...

Sylvia Plath has a great line about being pregnant: I've boarded the train there's no getting off.

I'd tell you to enjoy the ride, but I too am feeling the heartburn, the instant pressure on my bladder, the moments of panic when I picture some bedding/accessory/paint color not quite jibing with the other stuff in "the new guy's" room. Nothing about this very natural phenomenon feels natural, does it? Go figure... (notice I did not say, "go to bed.")

Carmen Andres said...

oh, i seethed when i heard that line, "sleep while you can." what good is that?! i mean, really. how was that going to help me one little, teenzie bit later?! that's like saying "eat while you can because in a few weeks you'll be hungry." sheesh.

heh, that schedule of yours sounds like mine. except i'm not getting up to go potty (still using toddler language and, you know what, i'm still referring to myself in the third person - "mommy", arg), i'm just trying to find a moment to call my own ;)

love you and wish i could be there. we could be like harry and sally calling each other on the phone as we watch "colbert". heh.

Amanda said...

Ok... so you are off "giving life" somewhere... and I'm hear to tell you there is GOOD NEWS!
You actually get MORE sleep WITH baby than during pregnancy. At least, that's my story. With Conner and Chase, my routine was ALOT like yours... and I am glad to say that after the first few days of new baby, you discover a routine that nearly triples pregnancy-sleep.

YAY! We are thinking of you tonight!

Brittny said...

man! this is way too familiar! i did what melissa did and it helped some. at least you could go an hour or more. and i agree with amanda too, you do seem to get more sleep once the baby is here. (maybe b/c you can actually do something besides waddle around and you can wear yourself out for the first time in a few months!) just don't worry about trying to "get some sleep" while you can just use your time to "relax." that way you won't be as frustrated b/c you aren't "sleeping." i was told that you wake up so much now to help prepare you for getting up with all the night feedings. and there is some truth to it, you'll just be doing something else when you get up. does that help any? i love reading your blog, it always makes me laugh and feel like i'm not alone. can't wait to see that bennett has arrived!!!!

The Khans said...

Hey Lauren, read your post on our blog about visiting us sometime, that would be great. We live on JaMac, 8764, the street on the right as you are going to your friends. I am usually always at home during the day and would love the company. Just let me know when.

Amanda said...

wait... i think i jumped the gun on my comment. you WEREN'T off having a baby that Tuesday (seeing as you commented on my blog yesterday night). Oops.

P.S. - We have a TON of unopened preemie diapers from Chase. When Conner was born at 37 weeks he weighed 5 lbs. 14 ounces and wore preemie diapers for two weeks. Chase (once home) weighed 6 lbs. 8 ounces and wore the preemie diapers for another week and a half. The package says "up to 6 lbs." but honestly, the newborn diapers aren't tight enough till they are in the mid 7 pound range... so preemie's are great if you prefer not swimming in poo.... My point with all of this is... if you want them, they are all yours! Just let me know. We've got no use for them (NO MORE BABIES FOR ME!!!).

Traci said...

i love this post.
as someone w/2 kids and spider solitare i totally understand!!
glad to hear that you have had the beautiful girl and things are good.
i had horrible heartburn w/my son, hunter, who came out with a full head of hair.
{chloe's favorite show is jon & kate plus 8!}
(christy's sister)