Dear Bennett...

....I am so sorry that you don't feel well. I have to tell you though that I was secretly so happy yesterday when you wanted to cuddle with me. You never want to cuddle anymore. You just want to crawl and play and explore. So, when you kept crawling to the couch and holding up your arms, I loved it.

I don't like it when your forehead is so hot. I know it bothers you, but it's fun feeding you yogurt. You like banana flavored the best. And I don't like it when you won't eat all day, but again, it's nice to cuddle under a blanket with you and have you rest your head on my chest. Just a month ago you would do that all the time, so it's nice to have that back for a few minutes.

And I'm sorry about last night. I know you couldn't sleep. I found you so many times crying in your crib sitting up and holding on to your ear. Daddy and I took turns holding you and trying to get your fever down. What you don't know is that I stood outside your door every time you whimpered just to make sure that you were okay. And you also don't know that when you were asleep, I stood over your crib and held your hand and prayed that you would feel better.

You still have a fever this morning, but you don't seem as clingy. You want to crawl away from me and bang on your toys. Sadly, that's a good thing.