Our morning started out with me waking her up and wondering why I was leading my little lamb to slaughter. She slept great last night. She now sleeps through the night almost every night. Last night she went from 10:00pm until 6:00am so she woke up in a great mood. I was already on edge. I fed her. She cooed. I got her dressed. She smiled. I held her and she lovingly laid her head on my shoulder which made me feel even worse.
Rob went with me to the appointment because he couldn't stand to not be there, but he was doing much better than his pathetic wife. I know this sounds ridiculous, but I teared up when they called her name to be taken back. What was I doing to my little girl? We undressed her and got her two month stats. She now weighs 10 lbs 1oz. and her length is 21 3/4. That's in the 30/25 percentile range which is up from last month. The doctor also told us she was socially advanced for her age. Of course. I'm just surprised that it took him 2 months to realize this obvious fact.
Then we waited. Bennett was in the best mood. She was cooing and smiling like crazy. We called Daddy Suttle while we waited and she cooed for him on the phone. And we waited. And she became even happier which made us feel worse. Rob couldn't bear to leave her side. I sat and waited for the inevitable. Then they came in. The Nurse Ratchets of Pediatric Healthcare. One came in to restrain her and the other to torture her with the longest needles I have ever seen. Rob told me not to look. He told me to keep my eyes on him, but I couldn't. Bennett was looking so lovingly at the nurse with her big blue eyes, and then, wham! She did as well as could be expected. I stroked her hand and she turned and looked at me with tears pouring down her cheeks. She got three shots in her thigh and one oral vaccination. After what seemed like an hour, the nurses left and Rob and I held her for the longest time.
She actually calmed right down when we held her. I was so annoyed at Rob. He hadn't cried at all. How could he stay so calm? He got her dressed and rubbed her legs as I composed myself. I felt so weak. I need to be stronger like Dad. She will have many more shots in her life and I can't have Rob being the only strong one. I resolved right then and there to take Rob's advice and look away from then on. No more tears for me. So Rob took her on to the car while I checked out. As I paid the copay I felt so much better and was relieved it was over. I went outside and took a deep breath. It was a beautiful day after all and we had made it through. I opened the van door and found Bennett calmly sucking on a pacifier in her car seat. She was blissfully ignorant of the trauma her mother had just been through. Rob was in the back seat, staring at her, and crying.
Daddy brought Bennett roses home from work. They made her feel so much better.
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4 comments:
That is exactly how it happened with us! I can't believe she is already 2 months old. We need to come visit before her and Elizabeth Anne start sneaking out on us.
heh. there's this weird thing with me and the kids and their dad. when he's around--like when the boy knocked out his two front teeth on the wood floor or the girl reached into the trash can and cut herself on some broken glass--i just about lose it. okay, i do lose it. i shake. i cry. i can't think one helpful thought, much less voice or carry one out. but then there's the times the hubby's not around--like when the boy got his concussion or girl got stung by a bee--and i'm as cool as cucumber, thinking sleek and smooth thoughts, doing the right things. go figure.
of course, it doesn't always work this way. once the boy had an staff infection on the little toe of his foot, and i about fainted with the intense empathy and helpless i felt as they cut into his toe for tissue samples and shot him in both legs with what the nurse told me later is one of the most painful shots anyone can ever get. that was one of the worst hours of my entire life. of course, there's also the time the girl had her concussion and i was four months pregnant with the boy--that was bad, too.
ack.
I know how you feel! Christopher got to the point where he didn't even cry and I was fighting back the tears!! I think it's harder with a baby girl. Or maybe I just felt guilty b/c my son was stronger as a baby than I was as an adult? Who knows, but Rob's right, don't look. Don't ever look. Doesn't matter who's getting the shot, don't ever look. She is precious and I can't wait to meet her! Sounds like we are van buddies too b/c we just got one this week and I love it! Burt has challenged us to a drag race, want to join???
And now I am crying too. Darn hormones...
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